Big Idea

To break out of the Sorry Cycle of longing and regret, we must first recognize our regret to understand what it is we are feeling sorry about.

Scripture

2 Samuel 12:1-13; 1 Peter 5:6-7

Opening Questions

1. How have you been able to B.L.E.S.S. someone recently?
2. Tell us about a time when you went through a whole day or a party with something glaringly wrong about your outfit or appearance, but no one said anything.
3. Learning to recognize your regrets seems simple enough. Yet the human mind has some reflexive responses to powerful emotions – such as regret – that can make it hard to face reality honestly. One unhealthy way we relate to regrets is to dwell on them and play them repeatedly in our minds. Another detrimental way of responding to regrets is to hide from them. We do this by denying a problem, distracting ourselves with other activities, or suppressing our regrets, hoping they will go away. These attempts keep us trapped in a sorry cycle. In what ways have you avoided facing your regrets?

Bible Discussion

4. As a group, tell the story of David’s abuse of power with Bathsheba and the subsequent murder of Uriah, her husband. Now read 2 Samuel 12:1-13. How does Nathan treat David, and how does David respond to him?
5. Read 1 Peter 5:6-7.? What does it mean to humble yourself? How can we do that when it comes to our regrets?

Life Application

6. Daniel Pink writes this about regrets: “We have 30 years of science telling us that people generally think more of us, not less, when we confess our regrets out loud to others.” What has been your experience owning your regret, especially when it comes to a relationship with someone else?
7. Has someone ever acted as a Nathan in your life? How might you encourage one of your close friends to be a “Nathan” to you by giving permission to speak into your regrets as Nathan spoke to David?
8. What regret do you need to face? How can we be helpful to you?

Challenge

Each of us has to face our regrets head-on! Like David, our first step is likely to crawl out of the darkness and face what has happened. It isn’t easy, but it is always necessary. You can’t change what happened in the past, but you can change how you respond to it in the future. Close the group in prayer.